April 13, 2021

 I have been consciously resisting the visions that arise during meditation until today. I’m still on the fence about the significance of these visions. Are they brain farts? Delusions? Fantasy? An overactive imagination? I keep coming back to this: The visions come through the same subtle sensing I use to discern Essential states, Diamond Vehicles, Boundless Dimensions, etc. They appear with all three centers (mind, heart, belly) activated and feel the same as Essential experiences. The question that comes up is this: If these are delusions, why do I experience them in the same way as Essential states?

They don’t show up in the same way that fantasies or imagination. Fantasies and imagination are like watching movies in my head. They may trigger an emotional response but usually they do not. Also, an emotional response is different from the full-spectrum sensing of the three centers when they are activated. If I take my Essential experiences as real, the question arises why can’t I do the same thing with these visions?


The difference, of course, is other people in the Diamond Approach experience Essential states in basically the same way that I do. This makes it easier to accept their authenticity because others are verifying the states. These visions appear to be unique to me and therefore can’t be verified externally. I’m all alone with the experience and therefore it’s up to me to interpret them. 


As you can see from reviewing my January/February entries, in retrospect the visions were coherent even if they appeared to come from nowhere and seemed random at the time. Gradually as my experiences grew, an overarching rationality came into view even if its rationality was quite outside of the realm of my previous understanding of what is possible.


Since coming to the end of my journey through the Bardo, I haven’t had experiences of meeting souls of the dead. Rather, I’ve had experiences with non-human beings and retrieved snippets of events that appear to have happened to me in the past, as in a previous life. I still don’t know what to make of these.


This morning I found myself standing on a broad stone wall like the battlements around an ancient, walled city. The walls were wide, allowing for soldiers to stand and patrol along them. There were several concentric circles of walls. I was on the outermost wall, looking toward the center.


The air was still and filled with smoke. It was an arid climate. The climate and the construction (and ornamentation) on the walls made me think I was somewhere in ancient Israel, or somewhere like it as it lives in the non-physical realm.


Located in the center on a raised platform of the central wall was something shining brilliantly, protected by a fiery, winged being that I recognized as a seraph. The shining object was a chest that was richly ornamented and immediately recognizable as the Ark of the Covenant.


I am somewhat confused by this vision because I’m not Jewish and don’t have any real connection to the Ark. Even so, I was deeply moved by seeing it and the seraph guarding the Ark seemed keen that I witness it. I bowed to the sacredness of the Ark and the seraph, feeling touched. I realized that there is life to religions; they live on in the non-physical. The Ark was never lost and can never be defiled because it is safely preserved in this place that is outside of the reach of anyone who might seek to harm it. 


I interpreted the smoke in two ways, one ominous and the other benign. Was it the smoke of sacrifices or of fires symbolizing the unrest in the present day state of Israel and the Middle East? I lean toward the latter, taking it be a warning. I suspect everything will be Ok but also feel that discord in the modern world is having an impact in this non-physical realm.


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