Introduction

WARNING: While this blog is generally SFW, some entries contain sexually explicit/queer content.

NOTE: It's best to read this blog starting with the first entry on January 3, 2021, and then proceed chronologically. It will be a lot less confusing!

I have been a student of the Diamond Approach (DA) since my mid twenties. I've dedicated my life to that path and have found it to be incredibly effective at piercing through the veil of the ego and revealing the sublime nature of reality. For those of you who aren't familiar with it, DA is a spiritual path elucidated by A.H. Almaas. It combines depth psychology with elements of Sufism and eastern mysticism. In my opinion, it's one of a handful of effective spiritual teachings. Students invariably experience release from their habitual, constructed self and delve into some deep and profound dimensions of reality. I can't do it justice in just a few sentences but you can check out the school's website here if you're interested in learning more.

After many years of practice, I was surprised in December 2020 when I began having experiences during my morning meditation that did not fit into the teaching of the Diamond Approach. At first, I thought I was going insane, hallucinating or had a brain tumor. When the powerful and mysterious 'journeys' continued day after day, a coherency began to emerge. I realized that, even though I had no idea what was happening or what would happen, I could sit back and allow the journey to unfold. Inevitably, what I needed to do would be revealed.

I'm the last person to believe in past lives, gods, angels or other noncorporeal entities. I work with computers and revere logic, rationality and the scientific method. This is the reason I was originally drawn to the Diamond Approach; it is supremely rational, perhaps because the founder, Almaas, was a graduate student in physics before he experienced his awakening after a near-death experience. 

DA's practices are designed to reveal objective reality as experienced through the location of the human soul. The practice of inquiry--one of the path's most powerful tools--develops the soul's divine guidance and can reveal all manner of vehicles, boundless dimensions and aspects of our essential nature. That said, it's a pretty solitary journey. You are alone with yourself and True Nature (the school's term for God) and, after your consciousness develops enough to dwell in nonduality, there's not even a self anymore and certainly no god. There is simply being/non-being and sometimes there's not even non-being! (I know, I know! It's hard to describe using words which are innately dualistic.)

I was therefore quite surprised when I started being visited by other entities, lost souls, angels and gods. Clearly, I'd been invited into a new realm not included in the teaching of the Diamond Approach. After so many years of solitude in my spiritual practice, I wasn't expecting to encounter such a busy place! It was as unnerving as it was wondrous.

I was raised nominally Christian but, mostly because of my my sexual orientation, I am deeply distrustful of all religions. You can imagine how shocked I was discover that karma/justice continue to be of immense importance after the death of the human body. Further, apparently there is a whole 'army' of entities out there who are dedicated to helping human souls along on their post-life journey. 

I am no expert (at all) but I'm pretty sure that the realm I'm 'visiting' is the Imaginal or Symbolic Realm as described by the Sufis. Western scholars like Henri Corbin and Tom Cheetham have written extensively about it. I haven't read much of their writing so it's entirely possible that I'm experiencing something else entirely. I don't know. This unknowing and my struggle with it is a theme throughout these journal entries.

You'll see that most of my experiences fall into the category of the underworld. I tend to meet the souls of dead people and the entities who assist them. Some of these entities might be described as fallen angels but I have detected nothing evil or sinister in their intent. Quite the contrary! These so-called fallen angels harbor a deep love and commitment to the human souls they help to liberate. One of the most uplifting things about these experiences is that no soul is ever forgotten, no one is ever lost forever. There are beings and other human souls (like me) who will eventually find even the most evil and twisted people. No one is beyond redemption. No one.

In my opinion, the underworld has gotten a bad rap. I could write a treatise on it but in general I believe that the judgmental positions of the superego have contaminated Christianity. The way we have separated heaven/angels from hell/the devil is a reflection of the human psyche's most primitive defense of splitting. Further, in our effort to appease our superegos, our desire for retribution against and eternal damnation for evil doers has become a fetish. 

When most people visit the Imaginal, they are unprepared for it and are essentially trespassing. (I'm looking at you, Carl Jung!) Not only do the visions of the Imaginal get contaminated with the muck of the unresolved issues of the unconscious, people invariably take them to be real. I've learned that the appearance of things in the Imaginal is just appearance. One needs to look deeper to perceive the light of the truth. I'm not saying that I'm infallible but I do believe that my years of work developing my spiritual practice is an important aid. I have worked through a lot of my own personal shit and generally am pretty skilled at recognizing my ego structures and instinctual drives. Finally, it's significant that I was invited into the Imaginal only after many years of practice. Clearly, I'm not an interloper and, while I definitely need to continue to develop my capacities, my soul has been prepared for this journey.

What follows are my journal entries about my experiences.  I've edited them for clarity and have removed the names of people in order to protect their privacy. I offer these in the hope that my experiences may help other intrepid voyagers. If you're moved and wish to reach out to me directly, my email address is will - at - symbolicrealm dot com.

Enjoy!