December 10, 2022

 And another journey this morning during meditation. I swear that I am not seeking these out; they just find me and it seems impolite to not accept what is being offered.

I was back in the Forest Primeval, this time in front of a fire…or was the glow of the fire coming from within me? It was hard to tell. Gradually, I became aware that I was being observed by two entities, male and female. They were ghostly and rather horrific to look upon, although I could tell they were benevolent. Their bodies were naked and ghostly pale. Their eyes were bulging and all white. Their bodies were aged, contorted and distorted, a parody of the human form. Their hair was shaggy and lank and completely white. I was reminded of certain Native American spirits or spirits from Japanese folklore. Again, though, they were there to help, not to frighten or harm.

My habit is to welcome all entities who visit me, regardless of who they might be. This was no different. I bowed deeply to them, inviting them into the firelight and asking them to reveal their purpose in their own time. We sat for a while in the warmth and glow before they turned and left. The message was clear: Follow us into the darkness. I did.

As we walked into the depths of the forest, I was met with a familiar blackness. It was a boundary into the dissolution of the Absolute. I entered along with the spirits. The darkness enfolded us and we traveled through it for a while until I found myself stepping into whiteness. This was the whiteness of winter and snow and cold. It was a windswept place, feeling like the American West. I was standing in the midst of a vast grassland, covered in snow and whipping with wind. Partially buried in the snow was the body of a woman. She was clearly dead, probably in her thirties. She looked like she could be Native American.

I stepped closer, kneeling down next to her. I was curious about her story, how she had died. Her soul awakened at my touch, revealing that she had died seeking her daughter. I could tell she hadn’t died just from the cold; she had been wounded, too. I don’t know exactly but it’s possible that she had been raped. As so often is the case with these souls, she seemed dazed as if she was just waking up. 

It was clear what to do: I invited her to merge with me, entering within my soul so that we could make the transition across the white veil and the black veil so she could continue her journey. The two spirits that had come for me were clearly her guides. She accepted the invitation, entering within me.

For a time, all four of us shared the same interior space: The woman, me and the two spirits. Gradually, though, I became aware of another spirit who was attached to the woman in some way. He was pitch black, spectral but benevolent. He seemed like another familiar spirit from Native American lore, the name, ‘Nightwalker,’ comes to mind, although I have no idea what that means or even if it’s really what he is. (I’m completely ignorant of Native American lore so don’t take anything I say as gospel.)

I was a little surprised to find this new spirit here but it quickly became clear why he was attached to the woman. As I looked into his blackness, I could see the body of a girl. She was also dead, like the woman had been, but more than that, I could tell that this girl was the woman’s daughter. This was the daughter that the mother had died trying to find.

I reached into the blackness of the spirit and pulled out the young girl by the hands, bringing into the safety of my presence. Seeing her reunited with her mother was heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time and I cried and cried and cried. The tragedy of having to die without ever finding each other was devastating enough but then to see them reunited after death…well, I don’t have the words.

We found ourselves eventually back in the forest and it was time to say farewell. The woman and her daughter were accompanied by the two spirits and the last spirit, the Nightwalker, lingered for a time. I could feel an affinity with him and recognized that, while he might be a creature of darkness, he was not evil. He was quite the opposite! I hope that I meet him again.


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