May 13, 2023

 I think I reached my current maximum for layers of reality that I can stay connected to at one time: Four. Today, I was called to retrieve a young man who had exceeded his limit and was stuck in a dreamland. Fortunately, while it was close for me, I could do it, although I pulled him out of a fifth layer of reality that I didn’t visit. I only witnessed its effect on him when I pulled him back out of it. I suspect he was of indigenous background because the realms were not Christian. I feel like I’m the typical American mutt in these excursions, having been brought up nominally Christian but also having lived as pagan and (probably) Buddhist in the past. I guess in some ways this allows me to traverse realms that may not normally be accessible.

Realm One: The physical world. This is the world where I am sitting down to meditate.

Realm Two: A Christian realm that borders on the pagan. I found myself inside a cozy, beautiful house in front of a Christmas tree. There were presents beneath the tree, a crackling fire in the fireplace, and soft light suffusing everything. The tree was lovely, both a Christian and a pagan symbol.

I looked beyond the tree through the frosty windows. Outside, it was nighttime and the ground was covered in snow. There was a stag standing stock still in the soft moonlight filtering through the clouds. It was snowing lightly.

And then I was outside tromping through the snow, following the stag. He led me to a frozen lake covered in a couple feet of snow. On the edge of the lake was a spring. It emerged from the ground, melting the snow and leaving a patch of black, moist earth. I knew the black was significant because it usually is in these journeys.

The stag halted, standing in the black water of the spring, and transformed into a spirit. The spirit wore a mask of a deer skull with its boney antlers reaching toward the sky. I recognized this spirit as a relative of my father, the old god who I’m assuming fathered my soul along with my dark mother. (I know, I know. It’s corny and it could be completely false but it’s what I’ve seen and what keeps cropping up. Of course, I know that the soul is born out of the Absolute who is the real mother and father but it seems like there are stand-ins for this birthing in the spirit realms just as there are parents in the physical world.)

The spirit reached out with a bony hand and touched my chest. Its hand flamed on contact and it seared into me. It wasn’t painful, though; this turned out to be just the way it was going to take me to the next realm.

Realm Three: I awoke to find myself in a cave. It was cozy and warm, lit by firelight. On the rocky floor lay a young man. He was clearly asleep or in a trance. I knelt beside him, cradling his head in my lap and looking down on him. I couldn’t figure out what I was supposed to do and so I just sat there and meditated.

Realm Four: When I closed my eyes, I found myself falling into the next realm. This realm was similar to the last but was pitch black. I could tell I was in a cave, even though I couldn’t see the ceiling or really anything. The only light came from the soft light of my heart and, at some point, I realized I was staring at another spirit guide. I could be forgiven for not seeing him sooner because his body was all black and he wore a carved mask of ebony. 

I knew he was an ally because there was nothing threatening about him. He seemed to want me to follow so I paced along behind him. Eventually, he led me to the body of the young man. He was still asleep or in a trance here in this realm and was lying face down in a shallow pool of clear water. I knelt beside him, wondering again what I was supposed to do. 

I was a little concerned because I could tell I was near my limit in terms of realms I could simultaneously reside in and keep myself tethered. Still, I figured that I wouldn’t have been called here if it was beyond my ability to handle. What’s a girl to do when she’s descended four realms deep? Why, meditate, of course!

I meditated.

After a while, the boy came to, gasping for air. I helped to lift his head out of the water and was startled to find his eyes were glowing with an icy blue fire. In fact, icy blue light limned his entire body. He stared at me through those coldly flaming eyes and I knew he couldn’t see me. In fact, I doubt he was even aware of my presence.

I lifted him into my arms and took him back to the third realm. In that realm, the blue flames abated somewhat but his eyes still flashed with fire. And then back to the second realm where the stag spirit was waiting for us. I understood then that the stag spirit was his guide or protector or something. Upon delivering the boy to him, he nodded once to me and then they disappeared.

I haven’t a clue what the young man found during his journey into the other realms. I probably will never know. I don’t claim to understand the shamanistic path, I just encounter its practitioners here and there during my journeys. I’m assuming, though, that he got himself in too deep and needed assistance “coming back up for air.” I was happy to help him. Like I mentioned, I don’t know he was ever really aware of me and probably doesn’t even realize that I helped him. I’m fine with that, though. What good would it do if he was? It makes no difference.

I was left standing in the black water of the spring. I looked around me at the beautiful night. Snow was still drifting downward and the moon’s light illuminated the clouds. I looked over and found the sapphire ‘angel’ - the same one I encountered a couple days ago - watching me. As always, he was impeccably attired in a wolfskin hat and winter coat. He looked less ethereal this time, although he was still obviously not human. 

This ‘angel’ has a slyness about him that the one I call Gabriel lacks. Gabriel has a sense of humor, sure, but he’s pretty straightforward. This one always seems to find something amusing about what is happening and hangs back a little, observing and assessing. He’s curious and knowing.

I complimented him on his ensemble and he smiled. “You’re like us,” he said, “but not like us, too. I can’t quite figure you out.”

I laughed. “That makes two of us!” I said. “But I’m not really that mysterious. I’m a fey creature whose heart was captured by a human; he turned me into what I am now.” I indicated Griffin, the sleeping giant who is always on my back. “And here he is.”

He invited me to sit down in the snow. I did so and held out my hands, which were really Griffin’s, allowing him to clasp them. (Griffin has such huge hands!) Griffin is merged with me and also asleep. His body is both heavy and weightless. We’re bonded together all the time even though only one of us is awake.

He took my/Griffin’s hands and stared at them for a while before inviting me to meditate with him. I did so and soon found myself into another realm. This one was familiar to me; it was the realm where I’d last encountered Jesus. It appears as a vast, empty plain whose floor is shallow water. Beyond the plain, the lights of the cosmos are arrayed in millions of stars and galaxies. It’s beautiful and ethereal at the same time.

I knew the other angels were present and that probably Jesus was, too, but I didn’t have it in me for another meeting. We simply sat there and meditated together until my timer went off a few minutes later.

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