June 4, 2023

 How to describe today’s experience? I don’t think it had to do with the soul of a dead human but rather seemed to deal with a non-human who had perhaps lost his way and needed to be pulled back into a different realm.


At first I saw the head of a giant monster. It was gray-skinned and had horns. Curiously, his eyes were shining yellow-white. And then I was behind the monster. It’s back was against a rock wall but I could squeeze past because its body was so immense. Behind it, in a crack in the wall, was another realm. It was shining yellow-white, just like the creature’s eyes. I stepped through the crack into the other realm and met a being of a great depth and compassion there. She reminded me of the Woman in White but I’m not sure she was the same entity. The Woman in White is, well, white whereas this realm and this being was more of a buttercream. (Kinda makes me hungry!) I’ve had a number of experiences in this buttercream realm but haven’t called it that until now. It’s hard to see exactly what’s going on there because it is so bright and everything is the same buttercream color.


Tears came to my eyes as I looked at the woman. She was very kind and also somewhat playful. “Let’s get him out, shall we? I think we can do it together.” ‘Does she mean the monster?’ I thought. It turned out that she did.


We moved together back through the crack in the wall and began tugging on the monster’s body. Surprisingly, we found ourselves pulling out the body of a man, or someone who was humanlike at least. He was gray-skinned like the monster and didn’t look well. He was clearly in pain and also seemed depressed. Indeed, the bones of his body were like rubber and he was too weak to even attempt to stand.


“There,” the woman said. “You can handle the rest.” And, with that, she was gone.


I was left in the buttercream world sitting next to the limp body of this unknown man. What could I do but meditate? I sat and waited. His body remained gray and he remained motionless. I sat some more, mindful of the fact that I didn’t need to do anything, that whatever needed to happen would happen on its own.


The sun in the buttercream world slowly sank toward the horizon. As I gazed upon it, I realized it was not just a sun but a tunnel. It led into blackness.


I knew where we needed to go and I helped the limp man to his feet, dragging him toward the tunnel. As we entered, the light faded and we were in complete darkness for a moment before a golden glow appeared. We stepped into a golden/amber world much like the buttercream world we had just left.


Something interesting happened to the man as we entered his new realm. His body lost the grayness and became fully-colored. He also became more vigorous and his bones were no longer rubbery. The realm itself changed, too, and became more vivid and colorful. It was sunset there as well and there were lots of intense colors as well as a lot of deep black.


I knew this place; it is the one I think of as my soul-mother’s realm. Steeped in darkness and chaotic yin energy, it’s a beautiful but deadly and unstable place. The man and I were not in any danger, though, because I realized then that he was like me and he belonged here just as much as I did. He sat down on the ground beneath a giant tree and closed his eyes, meditating.


I joined him in meditation. This chaotic world, while home-like, was also unsettling. Gradually as I sat, I allowed myself to open up to the blackness of the place. This seemed to be an important key to being able to settle and soon I felt restful, peaceful and at one with the place. When I blinked open my eyes, the realm had changed and no longer felt chaotic and unstable. Rather, it felt darkly serene and beautiful. It was now a twilight realm, one with a balance between light and darkness.


***

Popular posts from this blog

Introduction

Image
WARNING: While this blog is generally SFW, some entries contain sexually explicit/queer content. NOTE: It's best to read this blog starting with the first entry on January 3, 2021 , and then proceed chronologically. It will be a lot less confusing! I have been a student of the Diamond Approach (DA) since my mid twenties. I've dedicated my life to that path and have found it to be incredibly effective at piercing through the veil of the ego and revealing the sublime nature of reality. For those of you who aren't familiar with it, DA is a spiritual path elucidated by A.H. Almaas. It combines depth psychology with elements of Sufism and eastern mysticism. In my opinion, it's one of a handful of effective spiritual teachings. Students invariably experience release from their habitual, constructed self and delve into some deep and profound dimensions of reality. I can't do it justice in just a few sentences but you can check out the school's website here if you&#
Read more

April 23, 2024

  This morning’s experience was of the trippy, fantastical variety reminiscent of my first journeys into the Imaginal. I even went back to the white and cobalt blue city that I visited in my initial excursions into the Bardo. I started off thinking about how very strange most of the people are who do spiritual work. It seems like the people with the healthy egos don’t do spiritual work even though they are the best candidates. Instead, it’s a thieves' den of broken and unstable people (I don’t exempt myself from this classification) and these tend to have egos that aren’t well suited for the extreme dissolution required for spiritual transformation. Consequently, the broken become seekers and it takes them a very, very, very long time to in general to truly change. Most barely shift their perspectives at all. It’s kind of dispiriting. I began my meditation with that thought on my mind. After sitting for a while, I heard a voice, the voice of the Divine in my heart. It said, “I call
Read more

February 27, 2024

  No Imaginal sex today for once. ;-)  I was really planning to have a simple meditation but it didn’t work out that way. I became aware of the Black and then I realized I was surrounded by a pack of what I thought at first were black wolves. Their eyes glowed light blue, the color I have come to associate with the Land of Souls, for lack of a better name. These weren’t wolves, though, because, while they seemed menacing at first, I soon realized they were just agitated. They appeared to be huskies which are sort of wolf-like so I can be forgiven for mistaking them. In any case, the black dogs surrounded me, barking insistently and pleading for me to follow them.  I was still in the realm of the Absolute but it was a border region. All I had to do was look outward and I could see the edge of the realm. Up ahead was a shining blue-white beacon. It was so beautiful that it brought tears to my eyes. One of the dogs took my wrist in his mouth and pulled me toward the beacon. As we approach
Read more