October 20, 2023

 This morning the ‘Eye of the Heart’ was open in a clear way that I haven’t experienced for a while. This is not to say that my heart is completely clarified; there’s still a lot of polishing to be done. It just means that it was easier to perceive and things had a startling clarity. I don’t know how long this clarity will last but it doesn’t seem to relate to my inner work. Rather, these journeys, while deeply touching, aren’t for my benefit. I view them more a service that I gladly perform.


This morning I was back in the gray wood of yesterday (where I met that giant spider.) This time, a veiled woman holding a lantern was waiting for me. She was clad in white and hunched over. The veils covered her face. Only her gnarled hand was visible as it clutched the lantern. I knew she was not human. She reminded me of one of the Fates from Greek mythology. She was neither good nor evil, those words don’t really have much meaning in the Imaginal. I was very awed by her and bowed deeply, honored that she chose to appear to me.


She led me through the woods up a hill. Eventually, we reached the foot of a long, marble stairway. Two marble statues of winged lions sat on plinths on either side of the stairway. At the top of the stairs was a beautiful marble temple. It blazed with light.


I bowed to the old woman and took my leave, climbing the stairs. When I reached the top, I was astounded by the beauty of the temple. It was simple, being basically open and not containing anything but its very simplicity made it stunning. In the center of the temple was a white, winged lion with blue eyes. I bowed to the lion and it bowed in return, gesturing for me to climb on its back. As soon as I did so, we were taking flight and it sprang out of the temple, leaping out over the steep cliffside and spreading its wings. Soon, we were soaring into the morning sky. 


We were above the clouds and the sun was just beginning to crest the horizon. Ahead of us were a host of heavenly beings glowing as brightly as the sun. They were standing atop the billowing clouds and the lion landed lightly before them. I climbed off its back and bowed to the beings of light. One of them motioned to me and I approved, discovering that it held the body of a woman in its arms. She appeared to be sleeping but I knew that she was dead. The being held her out to me and I took her body, holding it in my arms.


“Protect her.”


That was all the light being said. I nodded and returned to the lion. I somehow managed to climb back on top while holding the woman’s body and then we were aloft again. This time the lion descended into the depths of darkness. Complete blackness enveloped us as it landed on a rocky floor. I recognized the place. This was the realm of my mother, the realm of poisonous blackness.


It became clear to me why I had been called there. Not only do I know the realm well and am immune to its toxicity but my body also was glowing with a soft golden light. This made it possible to see in the darkness and we proceeded through the blackness. I led the lion out of the cave, still holding the woman’s body. Before us was a beautiful, deep, calm pool. Its water was pure blue. I laid the woman’s body in the pool and she floated there briefly before her body dissolved with a golden shimmer. All that was left was a small, golden caterpillar.


I reached down and held out my finger for the caterpillar. It crawled up and I stood and walked away from the pool. Ahead of us was a brilliant, golden field of light. Every plant glowed with golden light and golden butterflies flitted in the air around us. Overhead, the night sky was deep, crystalline blue. The field of gold was so brilliant with light and life that it almost felt like daytime. I realized this place was a whole ecosystem, the dance of life and death. Death wasn’t the grim phenomenon of the physical world, though. There was a beauty and joy here. Death was a giving, life was a giving. It all came from abundance.


I gently placed the caterpillar on the leaf of a glowing plant and looked around. In the center of the field an immense tree grew, its limbs reaching out and up. It’s leaves and trunk and branches glowed silvery gold. It was bursting with life, even the organisms feasting on the tree were included. It felt like the true Tree of Life, presiding over an entire world of life where everything emanated gold.


What was there to do but rest against the trunk of the great tree. I sat down and continued my meditation beneath its branches. The lion lay down beside me, folding its wings and resting its muzzle on its paws. It was soon fast asleep.


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