February 19, 2024

 It was quiet for the past few days during my meditations. I thought today would be the same but I received a visitor towards the end of my sitting meditation. The visitor appeared as a corpse lying in a gauzy, white cocoon. It didn’t take me long to realize the cocoon was a coffin. The inside of the coffin was lighted, though, which struck me as odd but I soon came to understand the reason: The soul/corpse was terrified of the Black and resisting entry.


The corpse’s skin was greenish and slimy, evidence of decay. When I touched the body, it was slippery. I’ve had such encounters before and wonder if the soul is still so attached to their body that they stay inside it even as it decays. The appearance of the corpse was androgynous. At first, I tried to perceive its gender, trying to peg it as male or female. I soon realized this was a body of a male-to-female transgender person. She had long, stringy hair and her body was slender. I don’t know how old she was when she died but her body wasn’t the body of an elderly person.


As so often happens during these journeys, I merged with her consciousness and was promptly flooded by self-loathing. This person had not led a happy life and, while it was clear she was happy as a woman, it seemed like she was also at war with herself over her gender identity. Further, I got the sense that the people around her weren’t very supportive.


It is paradoxical that a person who felt so conflicted about being their body when they were alive would have such difficulty leaving it after they died. I came to understand, though, that this is precisely why they were having so much trouble leaving their body behind. It seems a bit counterintuitive but the more conflictual a person’s relationship is with their body - whether that’s rejection or attachment - the harder it is for them to let go when they die. Thus, people who are overly attached to their bodies (or their youth or their abilities) will have just as much trouble as those who hate their bodies or reject them for various reasons. I guess it’s a good argument for working through your issues and attachment to your body as much as possible before you die.


What to do but coax this soul to leave their body? I opened to them and was flooded by their intense emotions and grief. It was intense and I couldn’t help crying, although I should note I wasn’t overwhelmed by this. Maybe my own soul is slowly learning proper boundaries around these types of encounters? It’s important to have the right balance, not too sympathetic and not too withdrawn. Just right. Well, I think I succeeded because we successfully opened to each other. They reached out to me and I drew them into my embrace, telling them they had nothing to be afraid of; I would take them through the Black and keep them safe. I reassured them they would lose nothing that they valued. In other words, the core of who they are would remain intact.


This promise seemed to do the trick and I carried them into the Black. It was curious that my heart began radiating an intense ruby-red glow as we entered the Black and the person I was carrying was very entranced by this. “Red is courage,” I said. “And trust. These are needed for the journey through the Black.” As we exited the Black and found ourselves in the realm of the Crossroads, I realized that the person’s body was now black and their heart was radiating red. I smiled, understanding this was a very good sign.


My body, I realized, was that of a transgender woman. And, when the Woman in White appeared before us, she appeared the same way. The way we occupied our soul bodies so naturally as transgender had an effect on the soul I had just carried across the transition. They relaxed and even smiled. I wonder if maybe a little of their conflict about their gender relaxed and fell away. Perhaps the experience was freeing in some way? In any case, their being was lighter and freer than before and they were no longer attached to their rotting body. They could tell I hadn’t lied; they had made it through the Black and were just fine. Of course, there is always a ‘price’ to pay for passing through the Black but it’s not nearly as scary and terrifying as most souls imagine. In fact, it’s liberating.


The Woman in White was pleased with me. I could feel this. She smiled at me as she turned and led the soul away, down the road to their next stage of their journey.


***


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